Balay Mindanaw Foundation, Inc.

Kaangayan, Kalambuan, Kalinaw ... sa Mindanaw, sa Pilipinas, sa Kalibutan

A personal journey with the 'bakwits'
By Leonardo " Bau" Bautista / Posted 23 September 2008

	Nong Tiburcio with a bandage where his left ear used to be.

(I did not have the chance to run and hide because of my poor condition. I am already old and weak. They caught me in the street. They beat me up all over, pushed me, and suddenly one of them hit my left ear with a bolo. They dragged and left me in the street. My ear was bleeding severely. After that experience, I have a hard time sleeping. I have these thoughts of that night’s events. I am afraid that they would come back.)

These were the words of 73-year-old Nong Tiburcio as he vividly recalled the events that happened to him during the first day of the attack of an MILF renegade group led by Commander Bravo in several towns in Lanao del Norte last August 18, 2008. It was a shocking experience for this old man. While he shared his plight, his hands and feet were trembling.

Spending time with the people of Barangay Lapayan in the town of Kauswagan, Lanao del Norte has been a learning experience for all the participants of the Trauma Healing Basic Training last September 3-4, 2008 at the Balay Mindanaw Peace Center. This was the hardest hit barangay in the town during the attack of the rebel group.

I was overwhelmed while listening to the sharing of Nong Tiburcio. It was my first experience to listen to the ordeals of members of a community affected by armed violence. I have heard of such stories of violence from the news but I never thought that I would be given a rare chance to hear such stories direct from the victims themselves. Personally, it has touched my soul and innermost self. It has opened my eyes into the cruel realities and effects of violence not only to the properties but also to life – the long term effects of fear, trauma, and shock to the people. It was more than what I expected when I volunteered to help. The people would need long term support not just in terms of relief goods, logistics, and medicines, but as well as support for their inner healing, emotional processing and recovery. Looking at them, I wished that more organizations would consider extending this kind of support to the affected communities as an important post-conflict intervention because I can only imagine how the trauma will affect the men, women and children if this will not be processed and continue to be suppressed.

Burned houses in Lapayan.

But with my limited skills, I asked the help of one of our trainers, Bebot Rodil, to process Nong Tiburcio. Ate Bebot immediately asked Nong Tiburcio how he was and what was his feeling. Then she asked him where he was physically hurting. While he was talking, his hands, legs and feet were still trembling. Ate Bebot requested him to take deep breaths and be aware of his body, his trembling and the pain. She let him tremble for minutes while doing deep breathing.

On my part, if I did not have any internal preparations myself, I might not be able to listen to them and focus. The exercises introduced on basic trauma healing such as the deep breathings really aided me to also calm myself. And yet I took this opportunity as a unique experience listening to stories like the ones told by Nong Tiburcio since I know it is not easy for the victims to trust a stranger for them to be able to relate their painful personal stories.

Deep inside I know the process will not end here … it is just a start of a continued processing intervention to the communities … and a continued journey with myself.

Peace, indeed, is a way of journeying.